It's been forever since I posted a blog, right? A lot has been going on with stupid school, stupid people, stupid life, etc.
School is ridiculous. So hard this year. I'm more than ready for summer again. Only...8 more months :(. AP classes are bullshit. Advice to everyone that exists: don't take them.
Lately I've felt really alone. I guess maybe that's why I haven't been blogging...I'd feel too much like the computer was my only friend. That, and I knew I'd vent about things on here that I'd later regret saying. People don't need to be all up in my business.
I've felt like a lot of my friends have changed and abandoned me. I'm now dating my former best friend, which eliminates that whole thing, and we've been hanging out less than before. In some ways I feel like he's abandoning me too. But maybe that's just me being ridiculously clingy.
Things are getting better, I guess. The past few days, anyhow.
Sometimes I just wish I could go back in time: change my mind, prevent people from forming habits, kick myself for making shit decisions, relive some moments in my past. Unfortunately, I can't go back to the way things used to be. I'm trying to learn to live with now, though. I wish I just had more time on my hands.
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Junior year is a really difficult year in general. I hated mine! haha. And this is the time that you notice the changes in your friends... and for me, most of those changes appeared to be bad :/
Things will only get better with time. I always wanted to go back in time but then I wouldn't understand some of the things I do now and my life would be completely different. You live, you learn, and you try not to make mistakes again.
As far as other people go, whatever they do is on them. Of course you care, but if you are feeling down you need to focus on you. Find something that makes you happy, not just someone. Some people will really be there for you but for the most part, they leave, or something shitty happens and everything is lost. Stick to those closest to you.
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